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It doesn't take a car expert to understand that an engine needs gasoline to work correctly. Ok, for all your electric car fans out there - you guys need electricity... The point is that you can have the nicest, most expensive car in the world that will be rendered inoperable if it runs out of fuel. This concept is a running joke in our household because my wife has an incredible ability to drain all the gas out of the car and leave it for me to fill back up.

 Our marriages function in the same way. We can have a wonderful marriage that looks incredible on the outside but slowly becomes inoperable because we are not refilling our love tank. What does this mean? Think of your marriage as a car with an empty gas tank. When you do something that intentionally shows your spouse love or affection, you are making deposits in the love tank of your marriage. When you ask your spouse to do something that shows you love or affection, you make a withdrawal from the love tank.

Marriages begin to get on rocky ground when any spouse begins taking from the marriage more than they are putting into it. It shifts things out of balance and creates opportunities for frustration and resentment. No one likes being in a one-sided relationship, and that applies to our marriage as well. 

It may be choosing where to eat for dinner, how to spend free time, or even intimacy - we are presented with endless opportunities to pick our way or our spouse's way. When these moments come up, we need to ask ourselves if we have made deposits or withdrawals in our marriage's love tank. Are we doing enough to show our spouse that we genuinely care about their thoughts, opinions and desires? Or, do we send a message that we care more about what we want instead of them?